Mommy called today - she's been busy working for the 2010 Census so we don't get to talk too often - but our conversations now are turning into a blessing. I get to share what's going at church and fellowship, and she gets it, and I can tell her the things I would like her to pray for me for - God is an amazing God!
Of course, talking to Mom also means talking to everyone in the family other than Dad (since he's in San Jose and all), and so got a chance to talk to Joe - who just found out his SAT scores, and while they were probably pretty good by normal standards - he is mad at himself because he knows that he can do better. I think the fact that he cares about doing his best is good enough for this sister of his. Junior year is keeping him busy.
The most surprising revelation was my conversation with Jon. He was wondering about some class decisions during the winter and getting ready for MCATs (another Dr. Tang in the family???!!) - and while I've always hesitated because I really wanted to be sure that this decision was his own (no pressure from his big sister or anything like that) - as I asked him about how he is preparing for the process - it seems that he is doing really well. However, that wasn't what was surprising. The surprising change is that outside of school, he's fairly involved in church. I remember his Freshman year, he would just go to ABF, and I mentioned small groups to him, and he was fairly not interested. Yet now, he makes it a point to go to college worship, ABF, and an all guys small group every week during probably one of his busier years. I asked how come? He replied that he wants to have a closer walk with God. I am so happy that he wants to go on his own free will - Thank you Jesus! And he's really making an effort to know the guys in his group. Praise God! I used to be so worried about him. May God continue to mold him into a man after God's heart!
So, I am thankful that God is watching over my family Can't wait to go home for Christmas!
Ever since coming back from Boston, I've felt weird. Spiritual warfare is ever so real and tiring. Feelings of discontent and selfishness in some ways have creeped all over my mind. Questions of "Why me?" keeps rotating unendingly. Then at the end of it all, I was asked this past week - "Do you really believe that God will bring you the right person?" and "Isn't singleness lonely?", among many other similar questions along the same track.
First off, other than feeling lonely during studying, I actually don't really feel lonely most of the time. And I think that even if I was in a relationship, I would STILL feel lonely during studying. It's not like he can study for me - lol. I am thankful that God has surrounded me with people who love and care for me near and far. I finally watched the taped praise and thanksgiving prayer meeting after our September CWM events. I am thankful that God has given me a family of believers here in Columbus who will be by me as I complete my four years of medical school here. I am thankful that Father God is always by me every second every minute of every day. I am truly blessed.
"Do I really believe that God will bring me the right person?" I have my moments of doubt and questions up and down with all the ironies that God brings into my life. But at the end of it all - the answer is - YES I DO. Jesus knows me inside and out. He knows what is best for me and what will satisfy the deepest parts of my soul. If He isn't on the road in front of me, I don't want to go there. It is really that simple. Am I just saying that to make myself feel better? No, I'm really not. I am not against marriage, and I think that it is a beautiful thing, but at the same time, it is not the ultimate goal of living this life that has been given me. Maybe a part of that life, but not the ultimate end-all-be-all goal.
Maybe by the world's standards - my life is unconventional - as a future woman doctor - looked down upon - as a single person at 26 . Yet the truth is that God is doing amazing things in my life. He has brought around me curious seekers for His truth. He has given me a place where I can be of influence. I can see Him working in the life of others and I am honored that He allows me to be apart of that journey. As I see God bring my friends, my sisters closer to himself, I rejoice for another can find the joy that only God himself can give. Maybe the questions should really be "Father God - Why NOT me? Why not stretch me? Why not grow me? Why not use me?"
How was your Halloween weekend? Get a chance to eat lots of candy? I learned that Columbus is weird - apparently trick-or-treating time for kids is on Oct 29th from 6-8pm and not on Halloween itself! I guess every city has its own rules. In Boston, there were alot of trick-or-treaters on Halloween itself! Anyways, since some of you asked about my trip, I thought I would share a little bit of some of the things I did and saw with all of you:
1. The real reason for my trip: Asian Pacific American Medical Student Association (APAMSA) Hepatitis B Conference.
Some of you may or may not know that I was an officer for APAMSA this past year. APAMSA exists to promote awareness of health care issues for those of Asian descent. As it turns out, Hepatitis B (乙型肝炎)is one of those conditions that is not a major issue for the general American population but is very common among Asian immigrants and their families. Hepatitis B is the number one cause for liver cancer among Asians. Thus, at the conference we learned about the importance of the issue and how to promote screening and provide care for those that may be affected. Not only that, but how to promote awareness in our non-Asian community. Our new national APAMSA president shared with us that he would like to see APAMSA move beyond being simply an organization for Asians toward an organization for all health care providers in this country who see the need to be culturally competent in providing health care for Asians. I couldn't agree more.
Maybe some of you are still adjusting to the culture here and finding that it is harder than maybe you had originally thought. Maybe some of you find it easy to talk to your new American classmates. No matter what the case may be, know that real cultural understanding takes alot of communication. Even for those of us that have been here for awhile, we are still constantly communicating with our American counterparts to help decrease discrimination and bring about the equality that this country is founded on. There is still much to do - so don't be afraid to help people from other backgrounds understand why Asians (no matter where your country of origin may be) are so cool.
2. The fun part of my trip: Other than seeing friends who I haven't seen in a while, I had some time to walk around and explore the city with my classmates who went with me (one being my current roommate). One particular sight that really left an impression was the Holocaust Memorial close to downtown Boston. I'm not quite sure how to translate that into Chinese, but it is to remember all the Jewish people who died in Germany during World War II. (That period of time was called the Holocaust.) I've attached pictures for you all to see. When the Jewish people were sent to the Nazi concentration camps to be tortured or to die, they were each tagged with a number for identification. The memorial is made from hollow square glass towers that have numbers of all the people who died written on the glass. Next to the memorial, on a stone plaque were the words, "I'll give them an everlasting name. Isaiah 56:5" Millions of Jews died during the Holocaust, and while all we have are their numbers, God knows each and every one of them by name. God knows each and every one of their stories from beginning to end.
What story does God have for your life? This Friday, we get the privilege to hear some of those stories from those among us - such as our very own Vivien ! If you are able to come - just let me know!
Going to Boston always brings back the past for me, and this time, seeing friends again from an array of the different parts of my life, I came back thinking how much I miss my family and my friends. While God has blessed me greatly here in Columbus, there are times that I struggle with what I am comfortable with and what God is doing to stretch and grow me. I miss those comfortable understandings. I miss those runners beside me who inspired me to want to run harder toward the goal that we're all pressing for. I miss the water stations that leave me ready for another mile. Yet, while I miss so much, I am also thankful for how much God is here in my life and all that He has given me here. While I may not understanding everything, I am thankful that He has not left me here completely alone because He is always here with me. And I am thankful that no matter where I may go in this country (at least so far) - I seem to always be among my brothers and sisters in Christ. It truly is a blessing.
Dear city of Columbus out here in the Midwest of the United States - what plans does God have here for me? I don't know - but time will tell right?
...first email....and possibly many many more to come.......
Hi lovely ladies of Group 6,
How is your week going for you? Enjoying the slightly warmer weather before the cold really sets in? After a year, I am still surprised by how quickly Fall arrives and how quickly it may leave. As I was talking to a friend the other day about how I just finished another test, she was surprised - "Has it already been three weeks?" I laughed - yes, time does pass quickly! Many of you may feel the same as midterm after midterm comes your way or deadlines get closer for those of you already working. As I held a 10 hour old heart in my hands today for our congenital heart disease lab so that we can understand the heart defects that babies are born with, I cannot help but be reminded how precious time is. Whether it be 10 hours, 10 weeks, 10 months, 10x years - we've been blessed abundantly with this precious gift of time that some people can only pray and hope for. How are we living it? How are we using it? May the time we spend on the things that we pursue in this life be on things of value - now and forever.
This week is another special week for MSF as per Olivia's email ( there are many many special weeks;-P) - so instead of our regular MSF meeting, we will be gathering with all of the other fellowships at our church for a special time of singing and prayer. Why do we need a special night to do so? While there are many different fellowships in the church to take care of the many different needs of each age group, we are still one church, one community, one body. As the Bible says in 1 Corinthians 12:12, 25-26 - "The body is a unit, though it is made up of many parts; and though all its parts are many, they form one body....so that there should be no division in the body, but that its parts should have equal concern for each other. If one part suffers, every part suffers with it; if one part is honored, every part rejoices with it. "
Therefore, this Friday can be considered as a time for each fellowship part of the church body to come together and share equal concern for each other by bringing our thanksgivings and our requests together before God. As it also says in the Bible in Phillipians 4:6 - "Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God."